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365 Days of Writing Prompts: Day 11 – UPDATED!

January 11, 2016

This is your life

If you could read a book containing all that has happened
and will ever happen in your life, would you? If you choose
to read it, you must read it cover to cover.

No, most definitely NO.

I’ve worked hard for the past 3 years to live a life of presence, living in the here and now, via Mindfulness. You see, I suffer from Bipolar Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, and OCD. For 15+ years I battled with crippling depression, psychosis (heard voices) and suicidal tendencies (and attempts). The biggest culprit behind my depression was constantly reliving my past in my head. I incessantly dwelt upon my mistakes, bad choices, people who’d wronged me in some way and people I’d wronged. I had zero self-esteem, felt like a failure and indulged in daily negative self-talk. It took 2 years of intense therapy and learning Mindfulness for me to over-come this. So no, I would not want to rehash any of my past. I prefer to live in the moment and be present.

The same goes for my future. I don’t want to know what will happen. Part of the joy for me now is to just let each moment come to me, reflect on it, BE with it and then let it go. I do this every single day. I don’t want to dwell on what might happen, what could happen, or what should happen. I want to live spontaneously through inspiration. I think I deserve that now at my ag

 

Bipolar Disorder

Bipolar Disorder Infographic β€” Healthline

5 Comments
  1. You deserve it regardless of age, Lori πŸ™‚

  2. Again, thank you πŸ™‚

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