Upon Falling in Love With the Emotionally Detached
for JusJoJan – Prompt: 2016 (since it is 5 days into 2016, I decided to write about what was on my mind instead)
I’ve been watching Doc Martin on Netflix and then watched Pride and Prejudice last night as well, and it got me to thinking about men and women who are emotionally detached and the types of people who fall in love with them. Take characters like Doc Martin, Mr. Darcy and Temperance from the show Bones, for instance. They are rarely happy and show very little emotions and yet, they endear our hearts to the point that we cannot help but love them. But why do we love them?
For some, it may be because they think they can fix them, make them change, make them become someone else, someone pleasing. This is certainly the case for poor Louisa on Doc Martin. She is always wishing and hoping that Martin will change, that he will show emotions and become the man she wants him to be. The good thing is, Martin wants to become that man because he genuinely loves Louisa.
And then there are some who accept the quirkiness of their mates and even though they wish they would show just a few more emotions, they play along to get along, much like Seeley does with Temperance on Bones.
But the rare exception is the ones who see a reflection of themselves in their quirky mates, try to understand them and wouldn’t change them if they could. These are the Elizabeth Bennetts of the world who are shockingly enamored with their Mr. Darcys.
I personally relate more to the latter. I’ve known some emotionally detached people and have often been accused of this myself. Perhaps I understand them because in some ways, I am admittedly detached. I think it comes from a background of distant parenting, being raised by either an overly emotional parent or ones who distance themselves from their children. In some ways, all of the aforementioned characters had families like this. I know I did.
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